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"Equal employment rights for women,
just what do you make of this?"
Said Santa reading the latest regulations
as he gave his wife a loving kiss.
"Dear Santa, I wrap the presents
that the elves in your workshop make,
but - if I had to climb down chimneys -
something would surely break!"
"Painting toys in the workshops
is a job that really suits,
but how could I possibly go out -
in your size 12, reindeer kicking boots?"
"I've been to Santa evening classes
and learnt to say yo, ho, ho,
slapping sides, being nice to children,
but if they tug my beard it would go!"
"Handling the sledge on steep roof tops
with Rudolph pulling at the rein,
we might slide through a skylight,
and that would be an awful pain!"
"Have you ever had difficulty
handling the toys the young folk like?
They once settled for balls or crickets bats
but now they ask for - a motorbike!"
"Each day I get up, make you breakfast,
dinner, tea, supper, and feed reindeer too.
Cleaning, washing, pressing your costume
just how much else do you want me to do?"
"My dear the regulations are quite plain
all my hard work you must share.
You must satisfy specified conditions
to convince everyone I really care!"
© Copyright F H Bond
2003
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